ajft

When not snowed under by the sheer weight of spam and rubbish mail, its important to take time out to find those little amusements in the day to day junkmail. Here's one that came in today, personally addressed to a one-off email address that was on my site for a while, asking for a link exchange because clearly I have something to do with shonky weight-loss products.

  Please use the following details for my link:

  Title : weight loss for women
  Please link The Title to this URL :
  http://www.######.com/

  Descripcion:
  It takes more than just losing a few pounds to truly live a happier,
  healthier and more fulfilled lifestyle. That's why the Slim Girl's Box
  of Secrets comes with a unique set of benefits that you just won't find
  elsewhere.

Oh dear, a bit Too Much Capitalisation, and can you at least spell check your Descripcion.

Perhaps look at the format of your text and where you line-wrap.

I'm not sure I can get past the Slim Girl's Box, and for some reason I keep reading it as Slime Girl, not Slim Girl, so maybe the entire product line needs revision.

  I hope you have a nice day and thank you for your time.

No problem, my bills in the mail.

  Best regards;

  Sharon Rottino
  Web Marketing Consultant
  sharon.rottino@##########

...and I refuse to make a cheap joke about a spammer with a surname that sounds like Rot In O.

So many beautiful lonely Russian ladies writing to me. I'm so sorry girls, I just can't seem to find the time to get back to you all individually. As a homage, here's a photomontage of all those pretty pictures you keep sending:

Always such a tedious task, but I have to find the gems amongst the dross:

“I am MR. Gray Norman, an accountant”

Gray Norman, a gray name for a profession gray by reputation... how very appropriate.

“I am a straight forward person”

The wonders of the English language... given all the sexual innuendo in the spam, is he really meaning that he is a straight, forward person, or a straight-forward person?

Oh well, back to work...

Dear Senator Alston.

Since you seem to be under the impression that you can control the internet, here's a sample of today's spam. Once you've passed your anti-spam laws, I'll be forwarding all I receive straight to your office so that you can best deal with transgressors.

   1 O   Aug 04 Fulfullmentcent (   0) Friend, your favorite breakfast food - ou
   2 O + Aug 04 butedo@comic.co (   0) Fw: Hard anaI ACTl0N!   tAGE5vY0Qpi
   3 O   Aug 04 Print Pal       (   0) Save up to 80% on name brand Ink Cartridg
   4 O   Aug 04 Rate Quotes     (   0) Choose from hundreds of lenders!
   5 O   Aug 04 Black & Decker  (   0) Free Black & Decker Everyday Home Repairs
   6 O   Aug 04 youask4it       (   0) Over your head in bills
   7 O   Aug 04 Fulfullmentcent (   0) Prescription Meds--Free FedEx Shipping--F
   8 O   Aug 05 DentalPlans.com (   0) Instant Dental Coverage with Huge Savings
   9 O   Aug 04 rzq@up369.com   (   0) (8/2)
  10 O   Aug 05 Matthew Lesko   (   0) 4,000 Programs To Get You Out Of Debt
  11 O   Aug 04 Bargain Tribune (   0) US Medical Plan Now Accepting Everyone
  12 O   Aug 05 xanocediq@sammi (   0) Fw: Say ST0P to SPAM, Adrian.tritschler!
  13 O + Aug 05 xanocediq@sammi (   0) Fw: Say ST0P to SPAM, Adrian.tritschler!
  14 O   Aug 04 DumbBell Weight (   0) Get Men's Fitness and a MEGATUFF(TM) Dumb
  15 O   Aug 04 L. Wilson       (   0) Need emergency cash fast? Get it today!
  16 O   Aug 04 Laurence Judd   (   0) Getting a good lender just got easy!
  17 O   Aug 04 Ocean Club      (   0) We want you on our new Reality TV show!
  18 O   Aug 04 Psychic         (   0) Your Psychic Reading
  19 O   Aug 04 FoneFree        (   0) 2 for 1  Wireless Handsfree Device
  20 O   Aug 04 Coupons&FreeSam (   0) Save $25 This Week On Groceries
  21 O   Aug 04 MyRedHotDeals   (   0) Better than Botox?
  22 O   Aug 05 Fulfullmentcent (   0) no credit check, money by morning
  23 O + Aug 05 Zane Simpson    (   0) RE:cautionary Bulker CD cv i cerah
  24     Aug 05 Scot McAllan    (   0) CRADLE ALERT:  Microsoft Windows specific
  25     Aug 05 Louis Healy     (   0) Stop dropped cellphone calls!
  26 O   Aug 05 Steve           (   0) Does your printer need ink? udmnaofyf
  27 O   Aug 05 Willie Kern     (   0) Fwd:Beauty Secrets of Hollywood Models
  28 O + Aug 05 Derrick Staley  (   0) RE:septillion why not work for yourself