The Rosstown Rail Trail is all a bit of a joke really; there is no railway, there was only ever one train on it, and there is no rail trail — just a handful of signs at semi-random locations, some pointing one way, some pointing the other, and the odd place where there are signs that point in both directions. The general feel is that someone somewhere once got some funding to put a few signs in. That this was done with much fanfare and hurrah, then it was all ignored and has been left to gradually decay. The one information board on the entire route is buried under a thick mound of vegetation and almost completely obliterated by graffiti.

I’ve ridden sections previously, I think on one memorable occasion Jo and I managed to traverse the entire length when a few random corners turned out to be the correct random corners. This afternoon I thought I’d try again, taking my camera along for company.

The start at Oakleigh station looks promising, a distinctive red arrow in the station underpass pointing proudly off to the south. Just note that you aren’t allowed to ride here, even though it is a section of Melbourne’s Station Rail Trail and a major commute track, cyclists aren’t allowed to cycle on the cycle path where it goes through the stations. So get off and walk up the ramp and along the footpath to where local knowledge and previous experience shows me that the plaque is buried under the bushes! The arrow here points off along the footpath, but it is of course illegal to ride on the footpath so you have to cross the road and continue on the far side, under Warrigal road and along Carlisle crescent. At Richardson street you turn right into the cul-de-sac and continue along the Station Rail Trail towards Hughesdale station, admiring the broken glass and dog turds on the path, and the graffiti murals on the rear fences of the houses along the rail line.

A very loud CRACK alongside my right ear served to inform me that the magpie nesting season has commenced, as usual, they half scare the life out of you but unless you’re unlucky, or the surprise makes you crash, don’t often draw blood. Here also was my first navigational mistake, at the unsigned tee-intersection in the park I turned right to follow the trail to Hughesdale station, expecting to see a sign there telling me where to go. There is no sign — apparently you’re meant to just know that you need to go straight ahead instead of turning to follow the main path, exit the park and ride along Freda street, then left into Poath road and follow Poath road to the roundabout. I got to Hughesdale station instead, then turned back onto Poath road and headed back to the roundabout and the directions off down Murrumbeena crescent — from previous experience I already knew that somehow I had to get to the roundabout.

Murrumbeena crescent ends at a tee-intersection with Murrumbeena road, of course there are no signs, so I guessed — correctly it turned out — and zigzagged left and right and into Rosanna street, then past the large construction site of yet-another old-peoples’ home.

You have the choice here of riding along a nearly deserted quiet suburban back street here, or the bike path alongside in the narrow park which is a magnificent shade of pale yellow concrete. I wish more of the bike tracks where made of that concrete since it is fairly smooth and can actually be seen at night, when the typically black tarmac paths cannot — for of course it is exceptionally rare for the bike paths to have any lighting.

Amazingly, at the end of Rosanna street there are arrows not only pointing back the way you just came, but to the left, indicating where you should go! You should treasure this, it is one of the few times that it will happen on this trail.

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It is here where the park ends and the road goes under the Frankston line that I lost the trail for good. The path you are on ends at the tee-intersection, one road stretches off north-south, a minor road curls under the railway line and a path heads off north alongside the rail line. The arrow seems to point somewhere half-way between the path along this side of the rail line and the tunnel under it. If you choose to go under the railway you can either ride off into the car-park of a suburban footy ground or curve around north and ride towards Glenhuntley station hoping that each side road you pass will have an arrow directing you west and back onto the trail. You will search in vain, I think you are meant to detour through the footy ground car-park, but I’ll have to leave that for another day…